Because I can't stand the thought of ever forgetting this.

Because this is what best friends are FOR, people. Unedited except for names.

We abuse caps lock. DEAL WITH IT.


[talking about an impending book club for elementary schoolers]

Night: Lol OKAY GUYS WE ARE READING "IF YOU GIVE A MOUSE A COOKIE"
Night: BECAUSE
Janepage: YESH
Night: IF YOU GIVE A MOUSE A COOKIE
Night: IT WILL WANT SOME MILK
Night: AND YOU MUST KNOW
Night: HOW TO HANDLE THIS SITUATION
Janepage: SCOTCH TAPE!
Night: IT COULD CHANGE YOUR LIIIIIFEEEEE

***

Janepage: Just nudge me if I go off about asylums or burning houses

***

[after posting a long line of animated emo smilies]
Night: AN ARMY OF EMOS
Night: THEY ALL HAIRFLIP IN SYNC
Night: omg if their hair was lighter
Night: THEY WOULD BE BIEBER CLONES
Janepage: AHHHHHHHHHH!
Night: LIKE
Night: IF THE BIEBS DYED HIS HAIR BLACK
Night: HE'D BE AN EMO
Night: HE HAS THE SKINNY JEANS AND EVERYTHING
Janepage: ...ew
Night: ...
Night: he's gross enough, no need to pile on more nasty
Night: irritating little helmethead >>

***

Night: lol we just spent like 10 minutes googling ferraris and lambos bc she saw one on the street and wanted to know what kind it was
Night: she thought it was a ferrari, but it wasn't
Night: and now i am staring at pictures of disgustingly expensive cars
Night: HELLO MA'AM WOULD YOU LIKE TO DRIVE YOUR CONDO OR LIVE IN IT?
Janepage: Hahahahahaha!!!!!
Night: It was actually kind of scary
Night: WOULD YOU LIKE THE $221000 MODEL OR THE $382000 ONE
Janepage: THE EXPENSIVE ONE BETTER COME WITH 300 PUPPIES
Night: YES
Night: IT SHOULD
Janepage: OH YES
Night: INDEED
Night: I SHALL WRITE A PETITION TO LAMBORGHINI
Night: TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN:
Night: INCLUDE 300 PUPPIES IN YOUR MAHFGOLJAK MODEL
Night: BECAUSE IF ANYONE PAYS THAT MUCH MONEY FOR A METAL BOX WITH RUBBER WHEELS
Night: THEY SHOULD GET 300 PUPPIES


***

Seriously, guys, look at this sucker. Have you ever seen anything so grotesquely expensive yet awesome? I THINK NOT.

Nightshade is not impressed

Why does this bother me so much?

If you're too lazy to click on the link, it's a Yahoo article about how some things are becoming increasingly obscure, and how babies born in 2011 won't know about these things when they grow up. They do have some good points - in my experience, fax machines go often unused, and dial-up Internet and encyclopedias aren't frequented - but some of this stuff is seriously ticking me off.



"Talking to one person at a time: Remember when it was rude to be with one person while talking to another on the phone? Kids born today will just assume that you're supposed to use texting to maintain contact with five or six other people while pretending to pay attention to the person you happen to be physically next to."

No. Just...no. If someone is in the middle of holding a conversation with me and they answer their phone (for a reason other than a very practical one, such as letting their mother know that they need to be picked up at 4:30, not 4:00), I immediately lose a fair amount of respect for them. If I'm not interested in talking to someone, I will not inform them of this by ignoring them and texting someone else. No matter who you're speaking to, that is so unbelievably, explicitly rude that I honestly can't believe people have the nerve to do that.

I don't care if they wave a hand and say "Oh, it's fine, just pick up, I'm okay with it;" it's not fine, and they're not okay with it. They were in the middle of speaking to you, and obviously they were willing to invest time and energy in speaking to you, so why would they suddenly drop you like a potato sack? Call me old-fashioned, but I still hold on to that old tradition - you know, the one where you actually give your friends the time of day and pay them the proper attention and respect that they deserve.




"Books, magazines, and newspapers: Like video tape, words written on dead trees are on their way out. Sure, there may be books -- but for those born today, stores that exist solely to sell them will be as numerous as record stores are now."

I think I can safely say that this is the one thing that people say about writing that ticks me off the most.

Let me say this loud and clear: Books are not useless. They are not fading into obscurity; they are not being replaced by the digital world. The text of the books may also be available in digital form, that's true, and I'm not ashamed to admit that yes, it's very convenient.

But nothing can replace the smell of ink and paper, the brush of pages falling through your fingers, the lines of letters marching across the page to form imagination personified. Nothing in the world can take away the magic of holding a book in your hands. Whether it be new or old, read once or reread a thousand times, in mint condition or battered and loved, a book is still a book. That simple stack of papers holds the key to the universe. It keeps you sane. It gives you hope. And best of all, it inspires more stories to be written into more books that can be printed on more paper and stacked on more shelves, for more readers to pick up and riffle through so they can start the cycle of ideas all over again.

So don't you dare tell me that books are becoming obscure. On the day that books become completely obsolete; on the day that there is not a single person in this entire world that will give even a scrap of attention, a second of their precious, hurried time, to that bundle of paper sitting quietly on a shelf, waiting for you to pick it up and indulge yourself in its story; at the time when humans become even more stupid and ignorant and blind to the beauty of the written words right in front of their eyes: that is the day that I will say I am wrong.

WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN.

HAPPY 2011, BLOGGERS! YASJFKLAWEJ TLAJR LTKJAW;4 TJOI4J TALEJRG;JAERJ85YO58Y OES

Ahem.

I can't believe it's 2011. What the heck is this? Where did 2010 go? It disappeared, guys. WE HAVE TO FIND IT.

In the meantime, I'll be at Disneyland on Monday. Not going back to school till Wednesday! YES.