Late-night posting, Part III

I'm awesome at keeping promises, aren't I? "No more late-night posting!" Yeah, it's kinda 12:29 AM.

Whatever.

Today consisted mostly of a golf tournament (I had to be at my school at six-freaking-fifteen this morning) and then the rest is a blur of procrastination and frantic studying for chem. Yet in between the blurs, I've heard some really, REALLY weird stuff today (and for the past few days). Just thought you might find this entertaining (although it's no double rainbow).

***

ELIZABETH: "You should invite him to come to Disneyland with us!"
ME: "Okay. Why?"
ELIZABETH: "Because he knows things."

ME: "Oh, and she said she met 'The Situation.'" [MAKES AIR QUOTES]
DAD: "The Situation? You mean the-" [SWITCHES TO STRANGELY HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] "guy who talks like this?"
MOM: "You sound like a gay gangster. Don't do that."
SISTER: "And Kermit the Frog. Kermit the Gay Gangster."

SISTER: "But it says eta is E."
ME: "No, no, eta is H. You know, like in The Lightning Thief? Remember the part where they're at that water park? Annabeth sees the Cupid statues and she's like 'Oh, look, there's an eta on the base, and it's H in Greek and I don't know why it's here!' and Percy's just going 'Huhh, I dunno,' and then later on Annabeth goes 'Oh, H for Hephaestus! How did I not remember that?!' and Percy's just like 'DERP!'"
[NOTE: Meaning, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Book 1: The Lightning Thief.]

MEGAN: "Yeah, I threw up earlier, but it wasn't because of this Mexican marshmallow - it was from something else. So do you want some? It's really good!"

***

Also, I won't be posting much (if at all) during November due to the epic stress of NaNo. See you all in December :)

Golf.

This is just a really short post, since I'm in the middle of writing a monstrous mini-essay. (Why do teachers assign homework over spring break? It's called a BREAK for a reason, people. Like, a break from the punishment they call homework.)

Anyway, my dad had one of those "OMG COME WATCH THIS PUTT" moments whilst watching professional golf on TV. The Masters are on, Phil Mickelson is tied for the lead, and my dad is so excited that I think he's going to start jumping up and down at any second now. Also, pro golf's leading Recovering Jerkface just missed two reeeaaally easy putts. IN A ROW. It's like the cardinal sin of golf. (Well, that, and leaving a putt short. Apparently.)

So Tiger misses the putt, and the crowd goes "Awww," and then he misses ANOTHER, and the crowd goes "Ahhhh!!" because they OMG cannot believe that he missed the putt!!

It's a valid concern. When stuff like that happens, it sucks really bad, because you fail at life. Twice. Within sixty seconds. Believe me, I would know. I golf, and I've done that before. SO not fun.

Golfers get upset over the strangest things.

UPDATE: Phil Mickelson just won the Masters. (Yes, it's a good thing. From what I've heard, he's a really cool dude. :) ) I think my dad might scream. Phil's his favorite.